THE INVENTION
OF THE NON-ADHESIVE LABEL
John
Andrew Orther
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June 26,
2007 |
ADVERTISEMENT
DO YOU HAVE TROUBLE TELLING LIES? Hi Folks, My name is Honest Kowolski and I am the creator of a unique course in how to tell lies and get away with it. As this is my first time to advertise with The StickerNewz Report I feel like I'm in virgin territory. I'm so sure that you'll want to take my course that I'm going to give you Lesson Five, right now and absolutely FREE!
Chapter V: There Is No Such Thing As A Lie
There are, however, stories. Let me illustrate:
Let's say you're the husband and the ole lady.....er....your wife asks you about the fifty dollar bill she gave you that morning. You could tell the truth but why? At this point you must remember to not use terms such as "uh", "um" or "er". These words only cast doubt and suspicion on the situation. Try the following:
After the crow....uh.....little lady asks the question you must respond immediately. You have about 1.8 seconds of pause time to pull this off. Use this 1.8 seconds to (silently) begin your answer, "Once upon a time.......(then out loud continue)...there was a lady and her three children broke down on Highway 13 (use a real hwy as this will add validity to the "tale").....They were headed for Des Moines to her mother's home following a messy divorce...(the fact that they were going out of State prevents the ole battle ax....um....the wife from checking into the "story")....So, since they were penniless, I gave them the fifty." DO NOT SAY ANYTHING ELSE! Let your wife respond. She will not be overjoyed but, because of the nature of the episode, will have a sort of understanding and eventually approve the action.
Chapter Five shows how we don't lie - we just tell fairy tales like we were taught as little kids. I hope this portion of my program wetted your appetite to find out more. If so, get in touch with us at sales@lielikearug.org and we will be glad to help. And remember, I'm Honest Kowalski and you have my word on it!
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Now that was an interesting and refreshingly sincere advertisement. I don't know if it could really work but what the hey, whatever makes you money, right? Anywho, we are certainly happy to have this Brand New Client, Honest Kowolski, join the StickerNewz Family of non profit, commercial free radio. WELCOME HONEST!
At this time I want to continue our discussion about fire resistant and fire retardant Wedding Invitations and Bumper Stickers. We left off talking to Dr. Fernando McTavish. He had just related the details of the 1994 incident where a Des Moines mail carrier suddenly burst into flames while putting a Wedding Invitation into a mail box. In the decade since that horrible event the sticker industry, with the aid of the Endorphin Polytechtrics Diameter Finder, has perfected this card to where it is 100% fireproof. So, feel confident to order your Stickers, Decals, Labels and every invitation from any of the fine quality companies you see on the left side of this page.
Next time I want to see how Shemp Diesel is doing in the Bermuda Triangle. Until then,
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